*another journal excerpt from 5/28/2005
sometimes when we look inside ourselves we don’t like what we see. maybe what we see is too painful to deal with . But, we have to face our own truth in order to become stronger. I guess that’s why we have to re-visit the same inner truths over & over again–so we can be stronger to handle more of that truth on the next visit.
for me it seems like every memory, every important event is filled with regret, shame, anger, self-hatred. i feel too much shame to really face my truths, but i know it will only corrode me like battery acid if i don’t let it go. i guess ignoring it won’t make it go away. seems like it only makes it worse.